the est.

"Somewhere in you is the you whom you were made to be. We need you to be you. We don't need the second anybody. We need the first you." -Rob Bell, "Velvet Elvis"

My niece and her best friend are in constant competition. They fight like cats. Oh no, you read it right, I did say her best friend. The one she loves and plays with, and misses when they're not together.

You know in high school, when a new girl moves in to town--whats the first thing you want to know about her? Is she pretty? Am I right?

Why is there tension when someone is wearing the same dress at the party? When a strange girl looks like she could be your sister? When she even shares your name? Its weird right?

Whats the deal?

The deal is, we girls want to be the "est."

It starts with best. Than it branches off into families of the prettiest and the cutest. The funniest. The smartest. The richest. The happiest. The sportiest. The craziest. The calmest. The boldest. The loudest. The shyest. The nicest. The skinniest. The est.

You may be asking yourself..what is so stinkin' important about this, and where the heck is she going with all this "est" business?

What I would ask you, is: Do you find yourself longing to be the "est" (c'mon, I know you have), and if so.... WHY?

I've thought about this for a few weeks now. From the tender age of 3 and 4, I've watched my niece and her friend struggle with this little girl battle. At the age of 23, I find myself fighting the same one.

The est gives us our role. Whether we like the role or not, we have one. It makes us stand out, it makes our character needed in this drama of life. Its who we are, and if someone take our "estness" from us, they take our spot. Its fragile. When we can't be the est, we are no longer needed. Our friends will love the new "est" girl and forget about us.

WRONG! This is a lie we girls have been tricked into believing.

God made one you. One unique [insert full name here] est. NO ONE can take your spot. Not in God's show. You were made for a specific purpose. Wired with special characteristics, talents, quirks, personalities, the list goes on. Not only that, but you weren't thrown together on an assembly line, your were skillfully crafted..in the image of Your Maker.

Genesis 1:27: So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them.

Psalm 139: 13 & 14 says: You made my whole being; you formed me in my mother's body. I praise you because you made me in an amazing and wonderful way. What you have done is wonderful. I know this very well.

What this means for you and me is that we don't have to worry about being "the est." We already are. God has secured your role. Your role is secured in him and by, in your friends and family that love you no matter what. Yes, God's wonderful invention of love makes you his "est."

So, the next time you feel your competitive urge rise up in you, don't worry about if you have all that she has, be certain that you have what she doesn't.

1 Corinthians 12:14-18: Now the body is not made up of one part but of many. If the foot should say, "Because I am not a hand, I do not belong to the body," it would not for that reason cease to be part of the body. And if the ear should say, "Because I am not an eye, I do not belong to the body," it would not for that reason cease to be part of the body. If the whole body were an eye, where would the sense of hearing be? If the whole body were an ear, where would the sense of smell be? But in fact God has arranged the parts in the body, every one of them, just as he wanted them to be.

find your heart.

Where your treasure is, there your heart will be also. -Luke 12:34

According to the Scriptures, the heart can be troubled, wounded, pierced, grieved, even broken. How well we all know that. Thankfully, it can also be cheerful, glad, merry, joyful, rejoicing. The heart can be whole or divided—as in that phrase we often use, “Well, part of me wants to, but the other part of me doesn’t.” It can be wise or foolish. It can be steadfast, true, upright, stout, valiant. (All of these descriptions can be found by perusing the listings for the word heart in any concordance.) It can also be frightened, faint, cowardly, melt like wax. The heart can be wandering, forgetful, dull, stubborn, proud, hardened. Wicked and perverse. I think we know that as well.

Much to our surprise, according to Jesus, a heart can also be pure, as in, “Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God” (Matt. 5:8). And even noble, as in his story about the sower: “But the seed on good soil stands for those with a noble and good heart, who hear the word, retain it, and by persevering produce a crop” (Luke 8:15). The Bible sees the heart as the source of all creativity, courage, and conviction. It is the source of our faith, our hope, and of course, our love. It is the “wellspring of life” within us (Prov. 4:23), the very essence of our existence, the center of our being, the fount of our life.

There is no escaping the centrality of the heart. God knows that; it’s why he made it the central theme of the Bible, just as he placed the physical heart in the center of the human body. The heart is central; to find our lives, we must make it central again.

The heart is central. That I would even need to remind you of this only shows how far we have fallen from the life we were meant to live—or how powerful the spell has been. The subject of the heart is addressed in the Bible more than any other topic—more than “works” or “serve,” more than “believe” or “obey,” more than money and even more than worship. Maybe God knows something we’ve forgotten. But of course—all those other things are matters of the heart. Consider but a few passages:

Love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. (Deut. 6:5) [Jesus called this the greatest of all the command-ments—and notice that the heart comes first.]

Man looks at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart. (1 Sam. 16:7)

Where your treasure is, there your heart will be also. (Luke 12:34)

Trust in the LORD with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding. (Prov. 3:5)

Your word I have treasured in my heart, that I may not sin against You. (Ps. 119:11 NASB)

These people honor me with their lips, but their hearts are far from me. (Matt 15:8)

For the eyes of the LORD range throughout the earth to strengthen those whose hearts are fully committed to him. (2 Chron. 16:9)

--excerpts from Waking the Dead, by John Eldredge

simply love

Galatians 5:13-You, my brothers, were called to be free. But do not use your freedom to indulge the sinful nature ; rather, serve one another in love.

Mark 12:31-The second is this: 'Love your neighbor as yourself.' There is no commandment greater than these."

Deep at the centre of my being there is an infinite well of love. I now allow this love to flow to the surface. It fills my heart, my body, my mind, my consciousness, my very being, and radiates out from me in all directions and returns to me multiplied. The more love I use and give, the more I have to give, the supply is endless. The use of love makes me feel good; it is an expression of my inner joy. Yes, I love myself, therefore I take loving care of my body. I lovingly feed it nourishing food and beverages. I lovingly groom it and dress it and my body lovingly responds to me with vibrant health and energy. I love myself, therefore I provide for myself a comfortable home, one that fills all my needs and is a pleasure to be in. I fill the rooms with the vibration of love so that all who enter, myself included, will feel this love and be nourished by it. I love myself, therefore I work at a job that I truly enjoy doing, one that uses all my talents and abilities, working with and for people that I love and love me, and earning a good income. I love myself, therefore, I behave in a loving way to all people for I know that that which I give out returns to me multiplied. I only attract loving people in my world for they are a mirror of what I am. I love myself, therefore I forgive and totally release the past and all past experiences and I am free. I love myself, therefore I love totally in the now, experiencing each moment as good and knowing that my future is bright, and joyous and secure, for I am a beloved child of the universe[I would say God] and the universe lovingly takes care of me now and forever more. And so it is.

-"I Love Myself Affirmations" by Louise Hay

Tears Of.

New Years Eve is usually a pretty fun night. Lots of games, good food, fun people, all of that sweet stuff. Mine was like that. It was perfect actually. However, in the early hours of 2009 I sat clinging to my best friends shoulder bawling like a baby.

Weird.

But not so weird. After a way fun party, I was blessed with the priviledge of ringing in 2009 with some really awesome people. And at about 2:30, we decided to pray for our upcoming year; our upcoming lives. The Holy Spirit was there amongst our group of five friends as we loved, cared, and lifted each other up. And when we said amen, all I could do was cry.

I don't know that I've ever cried full on tears of joy. But these were. Straight from the gut, these were tears of joy with the realization that I have a God that loves me so much.

They were also:

tears of thankfullness, to be surrounded by amazing friends.

tears of weariness, for a 2008 that was full of battles.

tears of love, because I felt it really deeply.

tears of brokeness, I needed it. God did it.

tears of sorrow for things lost, and tears of bliss for things gained.

....and probably tears of exhaustion...I'm not usually at 2 a.m. kind of girl.

Something in my soul released last night, through my eyes, into my mascara, on to my best friend's shoulder. I made no resolutions. But I did make a choice. One that I have made before, and one I will have to make everyday.

It was to let God have my life for 2009. Really have it. To take my world and shake it, bounce it, mold it, and to make my life what its meant to be. These words can't describe what I felt, and what I'm still feeling, knowing that my soul has taken one step closer to God, and one step closer to understanding his love.

I hope you welcomed 2009 in with a bang. I hope your heart feels renewal. I hope that in 2010 you will reflect on a good year. I hope you allow God to work in you every day.

And I hope you feel and see and experience his love so greatly that the only thing left to do is let it burst out of you in a big way!

Happy New Year!